Do you know your priorities?

by Austin O'Neal

It’s a simple question that can be very deep and unveiling. I've found through consults and everyday talks with my clients that people are often too busy to find time to self-reflect and acknowledge their priorities. It may not even be that people do not know their priorities, but rather that their priorities have become so cluttered up with "non-essentials". It’s not entirely their fault with today’s culture of eyes and hands perpetually glued to a smartphone, incessantly checking who likes their Facebook post, favorites their tweet from 5 minutes ago, or who re-posted their filtered photos of lunch on Instagram. Social media isn’t the only thing to blame for this lack of self-acknowledgement. Today’s complex and demanding workplace tends to wear on people’s lifestyles and affects decisions outside of the office. There is also a seemingly never ending list of financial burdens such as student loans, mortgages, credit card payments, high interest rates, coupled with a still struggling economy/labor market to keep the mind occupied.

PRIORITY [prahy-awr-i-tee]
noun, plural priorities for 2–4.
1. the state or quality of being earlier in time, occurrence, etc.
2. the right to precede others in order, rank, privilege, etc.; precedence.
3. the right to take precedence in obtaining certain supplies, services, facilities, etc., especially during a shortage.
4. something given special attention.
adjective
5. highest or higher in importance, rank, privilege, etc.:

Moving on... There is definitely something to be said about being aware of one’s own priorities. There may be nothing more important than finding (or better yet creating) time to self-reflect on one's priorities in order to self-improve, stay motivated to continue improving, provide guidance for our own judgement and identify opportunities for personal growth. Personal development and gaining the most out of life, whatever that may be, is something everyone tries to do. Abraham Maslow proposed this idea in the 1940’s when he wrote “A Theory of Human Motivation.” In his book Maslow discusses how an individual’s most fundamental level of needs must be met before they will be motivated to address higher level needs and thus strive to reach self-actualization (i.e. becoming the person they were meant to be). Maslow coined the term "metamotivation" to describe the motivational state of those who strive beyond the scope of their basic needs (food, water, shelter, health). Just imagine for a moment the best version of yourself, who would that be? In order to truly become that person you will want to achieve this metamotivational state.

Ok, ok… I know what you are thinking. How do I get to this metamotivational level of thinking? The first step is for you to find and acknowledge your own priorities. And lucky for you I have some suggestions on figuring them out.

1. Look at how you spend your time. Where do you spend most of your time? Why do you spend your time there? Identify the underlying reason to why you are actually there as much as you are. Acknowledge that reason and assess whether this place is a priority that brings you closer or further from fulfiling your needs. For me that place is the gym! This is where I am striving to improve as both an athlete and professional coach.
2. Look at what fills up your space. What items fill up your apartment or house? What things in your life can you not go without? What fills up your closet or backpack? These may sound like ridiculous questions but the truth is that people often surround themselves with items that make them happy. Don’t forget about these things. Acknowledge these objects and figure out why they are important to you. If they are not truly important to you, then explore the idea of why you acquired them in the first place?If you were to look in my closet you would find one suit and the rest workout clothes, once again affiriming my priorities.
3. Look at your bank account statement. What do you spend most of your money on? This can tell a lot about an individual. People will scrape pennies off of the floor to find money in order to purchase the things/experiences they truly are passionate about. Find out what that is for you. Acknowledge what you would pay anything for and why you would pay for that. What is missing? Things I spend money on include, a personal coach for my programming, nutritional supplements, coaching education and cool new toys (for my dogs).

Alright. Alright. You thought deeply about the three points listed above and have your priorities listed out. What do you do now? That’s a tough question because it’s going to be different for everybody. However, my suggestion would be to start by removing things (spaces, faces, places and items) from your life that do not align with your metamotivational vision of yourself. Start small because this is very hard to achieve all at once. You need to approach it as part of a life long project because your priorities will always evolve depending on everything else going on in your life at that moment. 

I don't believe we ever 100% achieve our metamotivational/self-actualized state of being (a topic for another article). However, as long as you are acknowledging the priorities that make you happy deep down inside and removing those that don’t, you are on the right track and are going to be working your way closer to best version of yourself.